tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-167420522024-03-07T02:43:31.833-05:00Random SpewingsSo...I ramble...and I'm random! I know HOW to not ramble and HOW to be focused/concentrated--it just so happens that I like to talk and inform people and so...wait, I'm rambling about how I don't ramble! Wow! So, I do ramble! (I like to make up words, too!) Join me!Tonyettehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09701651294305220486noreply@blogger.comBlogger180125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16742052.post-8180786061010732802016-09-21T17:33:00.000-04:002016-09-21T17:33:04.627-04:00The daycare dichotomy! (An "Adventures in Mom-ing" post)My Baby Pumpkin is now three! OMG!! She started a new "school" (she now goes somewhere that is "officially" a learning center so we say "school" instead of "daycare") a few weeks before her birthday. She was going to one place that we--her, me, my husband, and our parents--LOVED! She'd been going since she was about 13 months, at the suggestion of an aunt and my cousin who had sent her little one there! It was amazing...my little Lady Belle loved it from the first time she stepped in the door...until...about a week before she stopped going. (I'll come back to this another time, maybe?!) Fast forward...we are about 3 or 4 weeks into her going to the new school and she loves it!! Again, we all do! Eden's daddy, me, her, and her grandparents...and her godmom and church friends and their parents! Just...errybody! Suffice it to say...where she currently goes ROCKS! (Shameless plug: send your 2 to 5 year old children to Kinder-Praise Learning Center...it's in Randallstown, MD! Tell 'em I sent you! Thank me later!!) But...sometimes drop-offs in the mornings still don't go so well. Whenever she has a "bad" drop-off (her, in tears proclaiming how she doesn't want to go to school and how "I want to stay at my house!")...it makes me sad...legitimately SAD, as in...I feel like I'm failing my child in some way! I feel like I have made a terrible decision! I wanna say "Who cares about work??" and just take the day off so she and I can go home, watch <u>Home</u> (again...for the, probably, 25th time...mind you, we just saw it for the 1st time in July or August), drink juice boxes and eat fruit snacks and chocolate ice cream! But...I remember that she's learning so much and that it's great for her socially and that we don't need any codependence around here! Oh...and that I need to work cuz...bills! <br />
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So, let me start back at the beginning! Before we got married, my husband and I tried our best to ask one another questions to ensure that we would be on the same page once we got married! One of those was the "To stay at home or not to stay at home?" (for me! More on THAT point in a minute). We both felt like "nah!". I didn't think I'd want to be a stay at home mom (SAHM)...and he didn't think he wanted his wife to be one. Well, a few weeks before we got married (I mean, literally about 2 or maybe even less)...I suddenly felt like, "Um...I changed my mind and I'd LOVE nothing MORE than to be a SAHM! Bring on the babies so Mommy can STAY HOME!" Well, I started to fret because I knew he'd said that he didn't want his wife to do so. Funnily enough (God is amazing!), he (my husband...at the time "husband to be", not God! LOL!) asked me again, like, a DAY after I realized that I had changed my mind. He goes "So, you don't want to be a stay at home mom, right??" I said, "Um...I actually think I do now! BUT...you don't want me to be a SAHM, right??" His response "Um...I actually think I DO!" So we were both like "YES! Super! We'll discuss this more when the time comes!" <br />
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Fast forward to 18 months after saying "I do" and our little baby girl was born! OMG! I felt like "This is my real occupation! I don't know what they're gonna do at my job because I'm never going back!" I honestly never wanted to leave her side. (I literally cried the first time I separated from her. She was about 3 weeks old. My husband said "You've been with her this entire time. She hasn't left your side. I've gone out...to church and the store and whatever. You can go out and do something. Maybe take an hour or so. We'll be OK!" I cried in the parking lot before I pulled off because I couldn't imagine going somewhere without her. I drove to the Wegmans in Hunt Valley. I LOVE WEGMAN'S!!!!! I texted when I got to the store. I texted when I was leaving the store. Mind you, I was only in the store about 30 minutes...and at the time, we lived about 20 minutes from there.) When I returned to work, she was staying at home with my husband. That made it a BIT easier to leave her...knowing that she was home with Daddy. But I still HATED to go! Then...he realized "Naw, I said YOU could stay home. It ain't for me!" So the baby stayed with my mother-in-law (MIL), then a friend's daughter (who loved our baby like her own...but she was pregnant and due soon!) So we looked for a daycare...and I was scared about it! Some STRANGER may be watching my baby! Oh gosh!! (My heart is beating NOW just thinking about it...as if I am doing it now!) But we found the wonderful Ms. Meryl (seriously...call Smiles Daycare in Baltimore...it's a home daycare! Tell her I sent you! You can thank me later!) She and her assistant the awesome Ms. Niecy (at that time, she's since gotten a new assistant) treated our baby like she was their granddaughter. But I STILL hated to leave her! <br />
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Where she goes now...all four of the awesome teachers LOVE the kids...even my little one who is a "newbie"...and she loves them! She really, really does! Even though she has tough drop-off some days, she NEVER wants to leave when it's time to go home! (That was true at her old daycare, too!) So I think that's a great sign! If she were to run screaming from the place, we'd have a problem! She learned so much at her old daycare!! And, she is learning a ton at her new school! But...on the days when she wants to stay home with me...I kinda want her to...just skip work and cuddle with my baby!! (But I need to work cuz we need to eat...and on my telework days, once I drop her off and get back home...I DO kinda do a lil dance cuz I have those hours 'to myself'...except, you know...for the whole WORKING thing! LOL!)<br />
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It's still my hope that by the time a second kiddo comes around, we'll be in the position that I can be a SAHM. (That entire sentence was faith in action...but more on that another time!) But...for now, I'll just keep hoping that drop-offs continue to get better and better... like earlier this week, my Pumpkin ran back to me before I left out...but only to give me a goodbye kiss before re-joining the kids for circle time (which includes praise and worship)?!!! So...even though I HATE to leave her, I know she's in good hands!! I've been very blessed in that way! <br />
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There are some moms who know "I can NOT stay at home full time!" And there are others who know "I can NOT leave my child's day to day care in the hands of ANYONE else!" Whatever your decision...just make sure it's right for you! And if you have to make an "in the meantime" decision...make sure that you are still OK with that one, too! <br />
<br />Tonyettehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09701651294305220486noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16742052.post-2610126759494026322016-08-12T00:29:00.001-04:002016-08-12T00:31:51.160-04:00Adventures in Mom-ing (1st post)<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">(I just re-read this and it is long! My bad!)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;">Hey all!! It has been a LONG while since I have posted anything! In fact, I think the last time I blogged, my baby was almost 17 weeks...or something like that. And now...we are weeks away from her third birthday! Time flies! (Honestly...whether or NOT you are having fun, time zooms! Can we all agree on that?) In the time away from blogging, I have discovered something: I <b><u><i>LOVE</i></u></b> talking about all things motherhood! Partially because I LOVE being a mom (like, honestly...God is amazing and He really knows ALL things! He gave me THE BEST first child!!!!!!!!!!!) and partially because I think women need to know that there is support available...and that we are not alone, whether we love motherhood, loathe it or something in between! So, between talking to some friends who are also "new" mothers--they have children under three--and talking to some friends who are expecting (YAY, new babies!), I have decided to start blogging about my "Adventures in Mom-ing"! (As my intro to this blog states, I like to make up words! "Mom-ing" is one of them!) I will make an effort to post more, and not just about motherhood and all the UPS and DOWNS and all the UP-ish DOWNS and all the DOWN-ish UPS, but a good majority will probably be dedicated to raising this true "mini me" (in so many ways) of mine!</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">So, first...why that name for the motherhood posts? Well, for starters, I LOVED the movie <u><a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0092513/?ref_=nv_sr_1" target="_blank">Adventures in Babysitting</a></u> as a kid! (If you don't know about this movie, we CAN'T speak until you watch it! Now...keep in mind, it's nearly 30 years old and I probably haven't seen it in 20! But...it is the principle!) But I MOSTLY chose that name because, honestly, motherhood is CHOCK full of adventures of all kinds--ones that make you giddily happy, deeply sad, immensely proud, gravely disappointed, and every other emotion possible (and my baby is only 2!)! Some adventures are solely about me/my feelings/thoughts/experiences or outlook as a mom. Others are solely about my Baby Pumpkin, some great thing she did or said <i><b>or</b> </i>some UN-great thing she did or said. Still others are a mix of both, what she said and then how it made me feel! Like I said, I want to talk about the good, the bad AND the ugly!</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">So...what is the first adventure? I went over and over, in my head, what to discuss first! Should it be the time I let my baby girl eat cookies for breakfast--relax, I think it was just ONE cookie and that wasn't the ONLY thing she had--or the <b>more than one</b> time she has left my mom's house with no bottoms on (because I have forgotten her bag of extra clothes...or i forgot to restock the bag!)? No...I can talk about those later! Should it be how she is already telling me what she wants to wear (and does NOT want to wear)? Plenty of time for those posts! My first adventure is about JUST that...the fact that this is MY adventure in mom-ing! In the recent past (as in...a few months ago), I came to realize that, although I did NOT think so, I was comparing myself to so many people around me...even as I shouted (internally and externally, figuratively and sometimes, well...) that this is MY child and I am HER mother and we'll do things according to what is best for us and our family...I was still asking certain questions to get validation for certain things I was doing or certain feelings I was having. For example, I am 37 and as previously stated, my Baby Pumpkin will be 3 in a few weeks. When I was getting ready to turn 3, my mom was heading towards her 27th birthday. She also had a newborn son. (As, my brother was born on June 11th and I turned 3 on July 3.) Also, when my mom turned 37, my brother and I were 10 & 13, respectively. Just keep that in mind as I make my point...I had been really tired in the recent past! (I realized I need to TAKE MY MEDS without EVER missing--more on that in another post, perhaps--and that I needed to get back into taking vitamins!) I started asking my mom if she was tired ALL THE TIME when we were younger. She said, basically, "Um, no!" So...I started off, to myself and in defense of myself, with the facts listed above. "She was TEN years younger than I am when I was 2 & 3." "When she was my current age, we were a teen and almost a teen!" I had this entire internal conversation, and it made me realize...I was comparing myself to my mom (like I had done with my mother-in-law, aunts, friends, celebs and whomever else!) But this is MY motherhood...and even if my mom (who was, and still is, a HECK of a mom) was not tired all the time, like I was feeling...it doesn't matter...because that was HER experience! This is mine! I don't have to feel inferior because my mom had more energy than I did. At the end of the day, I am not my mom (or anyone else)! I knew that in so many areas of my life...but when I became a mother, somehow I lost sight of the fact that comparing myself to anyone else is pointless! Of course I want her advice (and my MIL's, my pastor's, and trusted friends)...but it IS OK to feel however I feel about MY motherhood AND all the happenings therein and thereof!</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">That's why I plan to blog about this ...so that people can see it is OK to feel however you want! People won't always agree with my decisions, reactions or thoughts...but that's perfectly fine! This space, "Adventures in Mom-ing", is a place to come and see that it's OK if you had to nurse your baby while you were brushing your teeth or if you wanted to cry every time your baby cried when you brought him or her home from the hospital or if you DID cry every time he or she cried! It's OK if you feel like you have the smartest daughter on the planet (like I THINK) OR if you wonder if your son WILL actually grow into his hands & feet like you were told because you "feel some type of way" about having a child with big hands and feet! All are welcome here! Remember, this is a place for the good, the bad and the ugly! Please feel WELCOME! </span></span>Tonyettehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09701651294305220486noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16742052.post-35628379187470865022014-06-12T17:33:00.000-04:002014-06-12T17:33:05.562-04:00Blogging aka I'll be back! It's been months (six, I believe) since I've last posted anything! TONS of stuff is happening in my life...not all good, but not all bad! God continues to be magnificent in my life! My baby girl, the prettiest girl in the <strong><u><em><span style="font-size: large;">entire</span></em></u></strong> world, is now nine months and busier than EVER! Whew! I've been in the mood to write...not just blog posting, but maybe poetry, or a short story, or just...words together in some kind of organized fashion. I'm not exactly sure of what or how or when, but I'll be back...blogging, writing, in general, being awesome with words! ;-) <br />
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Until then, remember that with man it's impossible, but with GOD, ALL things are possible!! Tonyettehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09701651294305220486noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16742052.post-25483569258508937562013-12-31T10:56:00.000-05:002013-12-31T10:56:19.439-05:00Time fliesToday is December 31, 2013! Wow! As the title indicates, I'm sitting here thinking about how time flies! I haven't blogged in a while! So, let's see if I can play "catch up" in this posting. My beautiful daughter, the lovely Lady Eden, was born on September 4 at 11:38am. It was a quick and easy delivery. Labor wasn't too bad, either, more discomfort than anything else. My entire pregnancy (though I did develop gestational diabetes) was pretty great and was really an answer to my prayers! Eden has been a joy and delight to raise. Sure, she's only (as of tomorrow) 17 weeks, but hey...those can be tough times for new parents! She's so pleasant and peaceful. She sleeps well (now, for the most part, PRAISE GOD!) and eats even well-er! LOL! I honestly still can't believe that I'm a mom or that my husband is a dad; it's CRAZY! But, it's super! She has made the three of us a family! I mean, sure we were a family before she was born. But...she's added a new and wonderful element. <br />
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In 6 months and 3 days, I'll be 35. That is crazy and strange and exciting! I'm looking forward to all that being able to say "I'm 35" will bring! I don't know exactly what, but I anticipate SOMETHING! <br />
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In the past year, friends have gotten married. Others are now expecting. Tons of stuff has happened in 2013. I can't wait to see what 2014 has in store for me, my family and friends. <br />
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Happy New Year! Tonyettehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09701651294305220486noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16742052.post-20968239585037581942013-05-03T17:48:00.002-04:002013-05-03T17:48:33.761-04:00SHE'S on the way!!!So, as promised, I am back with an update about our BABY!! As you may have guessed from the title, we'll be having a baby GIRL!! Oh my goodness...we are giddy! Though my husband and I kept saying, "We want a boy"...we were THRILLED when the, uh "ultrasound tech"--that's what she is, right??--said, "I don't see any boy parts. I think we have a baby girl!" I think the real joy was just knowing that SHE is real!! Seeing her feet, legs, arms, heart beating (again) and hearing it (again)...knowing her little weight--she's not yet a lb! BUT, it does seem she's already above the average weight of, uh, a fetus, her size--just made it even more exciting! We had already picked out names...so we were prepared, either way. We can now use her name around the house--we have decided not to reveal her name to everyone, probably until she's born. We can say "she" and "her"; it makes it all so real!! A real THRILL, that is!! <br />
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Seeing my husband's reaction to & preparation for her brings another level of joy that I, quite honestly, didn't expect to feel! One day, as usual, he called to see how I was doing. I responded & then he asked about "my daughter". Wow! I could cry now just thinking about it! It's an amazing feeling, knowing that he is so ready to love this baby girl that we created! He declared, as I was STILL laying down on the, uh, "sonogramming table?"--seriously, why can't I think of any terms today--that she IS already a princess and that he WILL be spoiling her! Yes, sir! Well...now that THAT is all cleared up...!! LOL! Actually, though, it's an incredible thing and I hope that she--and all other girls we have/adopt & raise--will be "Daddy's girls" who will expect nothing less than what their Heavenly Daddy, first and foremost, and their "natural" daddy gave them! Shoot, she'll be my princess, too, and I plan to treat her that way, as well! <br />
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Now, admittedly, I'm not known for being the girliest of girls, but...I am looking forward to raising a daughter...sharing with her the same bond that my mother and I have...but still letting it be "our own special bond"...me and my daughter.I'm looking forward to, and at the same time, nervous as all heck about, loving, teaching, encouraging, supporting, disciplining, guiding and helping to mold her into a woman who loves God, herself, family & friends. I want her to be a woman who knows who she is in Christ and who He created her to be. I want her to know why He made her and her purpose for being here. I don't want her to have to suffer some of the things I had to suffer through, trying to "figure life out". I want her to know she's awesome, from the moment she's born...and never lose sight of that! Anyone who won't foster her "awesome, special, greatness" doesn't get to be around her, point blank! I plan to strictly enforce that and I'm sure my husband feels the same way--but I should probably verify that with him...to ensure we are on the same page! I have, as I'm sure most any parent has, such high aspirations for her...to just be...better than me. I already want more for her than myself. I feel myself changing, knowing that she's coming! It excites me...and has me ready to see what raising her will bring...in me, in my husband...even in my mom & parents-in-law, who will all be first time grandparents! <br />
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She's a GIRL...and we can't wait to see her!!<br />
21 weeks down...19 to go! (I'm hoping she's right on time! Or a bit early!...Being 41 or 42 weeks pregnant...ain't nobody got time for that!!) Tonyettehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09701651294305220486noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16742052.post-2322261353782439262013-04-10T10:06:00.000-04:002013-04-10T10:06:00.642-04:0018 Weeks!That's how far along I am in my pregnancy: 18 weeks...today! That means in two weeks, we get to find out if this is a baby boy or girl! That also means in 22 weeks, give or take, my little bundle of JOY will be arriving! My husband and I are thrilled beyond words! I figured that I would be happy when I got pregnant, but I didn't imagine it would be like this! It's so exciting and weird and awesome being pregnant. My body has been, sometimes, all the same, and other times, SO. VERY. DIFFERENT! <br />
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Thankfully, I haven't gained much weight. God really answered my prayer with that one! Seriously! I have enough, thank you very much! So, I didn't need more! My doctor actually gave me the OK not to gain any! Since she said that, I first lost seven pounds...but then I FOUND all seven and 1 more! Since she said don't gain any, I've gained one pound! If you ask me, not bad for being 4 and a half months pregnant! I've started wearning maternity clothes, not exclusively, but they've been incorporated into my wardrobe, slowly but surely.<br />
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Part of what has made this pregnancy so exciting is seeing how excited other people are for us! People who barely show emotion are gushing all over the place! It's pretty amazing to witness. Folks are talking to my stomach! Some are asking how the baby is or telling me to tell the baby "hi" and other things! It's rather funny!! I'm also touched by it! There are some very loving people in my life and it makes me happy! <br />
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Now, of course, there is the TOUCHING issue! I think the fact that most people who know me do know that I'm...rather disinterested in unsolicited touching and already know to be on alert when it comes to touching me, in general, has helped out a lot! Thankfully, no seriously, THANKFULLY, no strangers have even made it seem like they are about to touch! I, honestly, am not sure of how I would handle that...but again, I'm just glad that I haven't had to deal with it so far. <br />
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I've tried very hard not to be "all pregnancy talk, all the time"...but it can be hard! :0) <br />
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I'm going to try to blog more...and I'll be sure to come back with updates about Baby! At least, for sure, once I know the gender! <br />
Tonyettehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09701651294305220486noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16742052.post-88449209481315867842013-02-08T17:05:00.001-05:002013-02-08T17:50:01.872-05:00The things people do...I haven't posted in a really long time--LOTS GOING ON (busy at work, husband & I moved...OH AND A BABY ON THE WAY!!!!!!! YAHOO!!!!) <br />
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I'm hoping to be able to blog more this year...I actually really like writing and would like to do it more often! With that said, I felt compelled to write today!<br />
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The last few weeks, well months really, people have been amazing me...and NOT in a positive way! I have been wondering...what drives most people? Why do people do the things that they do?! <br />
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I'm convinced that, for some people, it's an unhealthy self-centeredness! What do I mean by this? If "you"--"you" here being anyone to whom this is applicable--are only focused on the things that are happening in your world, and you can't seem to grasp that there is an entire world of things going on around you, you may have an enlarged sense of self. To me, this is different than someone who is just selfish! Selfish people know, for example, that you have a need (maybe money or food), and they don't care. They still won't help, even if they can! Someone who is self-centered, in the sense that I've been talking about, wouldn't even realize that you have a need because, after all, his car needs repairing or her son needs new tennis shoes (sneakers, for those who may not live in Baltimore! LOL!). I see this form of self-centeredness all around me. It worries me and it also stumps me because I'm not built that way. (This is not "horn-tooting"...I'm merely saying that I literally can't understand people who are wired this way.) <br />
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Some people, they operate out of the need to please others. It's almost in direct opposition to being self-centered. This need to people-please worries and saddens me...and the funny thing is that I can SO relate to it! I only recently stopped letting myself be driven by the need to please everyone around me. These days, if God is pleased, that's all I need! (Of course, I always make sure that everything I do has my husband's OK, but I don't live my life trying to gain his "approval". What a sad marriage, for ME, if I did!) Now, if others are happy, that's a latent bonus for me! I see this, the need to please people, all around me, as well. People are buying gifts they can't afford & wearing clothes they don't even like all to gain someone else's approval. I'm deeply grieved whenever I see someone striving for the approval of someone, especially because usually it's someone whose opinion shouldn't matter OR it's someone who probably won't approve, no matter what you do! <br />
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I've just been people-watching and doing a bit of people-analyzing...and doing lots of thinking! I don't have any solutions or things to offer, as of yet...so for now, this is just thoughts! Tonyettehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09701651294305220486noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16742052.post-26523078205554501212012-09-19T07:48:00.000-04:002012-09-19T07:48:00.577-04:00Go read it!My friend Tiffany over at <a href="http://reconstructingtiffany.blogspot.com/" target="_blank">Reconstructing Tiffany</a> is a wonderful writer! She captured an awesome experience that we (her, me, our friends and church family) had over the weekend beautifully! Rather than try to capture the same feelings without being repetitive, I decided to just send you to her page! The post is entitled "<a href="http://reconstructingtiffany.blogspot.com/2012/09/all-things-in-common.html" target="_blank">All Things in Common</a>". <br />
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I hope you enjoy it as much as I did! Tonyettehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09701651294305220486noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16742052.post-49024129618382390542012-08-21T16:21:00.000-04:002012-08-21T16:21:08.547-04:00Aging like a fine wine!I can "feel" myself getting older! NO! I can't literally feel my bones or skin or anything changing! LOL! But...I can just sense the changes that I'm going through (emotionally, mentally, and yes, some physically) and I gotta say...I'm digging it! <br />
There are things that REALLY excite me now, that just a few years ago, I'd never give a flip about! The idea of decorating my house (the new one that the hubby and I are about to get! I'm speaking it into existence!) is the most thrilling thing to think about these days! I'm like, "ooh, what colors do I want for the master bedroom?" Or, I'll see something in Target and be like "OOH, I could put this in the formal living room"! Or see a throw rug or a pillow somewhere and think "WOW! This would be SO much fun in the family room!" I have to laugh at myself, sometimes!<br />
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Another thing: While I still LOVE my fashion blogs (especially the ones by/for plus size women!)...I'm really getting into food blogs! It only makes sense seeing how much I love, love, LOVE to eat! It was probably only a matter of time before I started to get into food blogs! And that has led me to a few blogs where the writers talk about other things, like DIY projects! I'd really love to try to DIY...something! I've been talking about that for a few years. I really want to and soon! <br />
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What else? I'm finding myself saying "I don't think I should wear that! I'm too old for that!" and I'm ok with it! Certain trends are for the 18-year-olds. I haven't been one of those in 15 years...and I'm cool with it! I'm embracing my 30s. I think I'm getting better (wiser, more confident, more settled and hey, I'm even prettier!...at least I think so!) as I get older! I am already anticipating my "fabulous at 40" party! I'll start dropping hints to The Husband in about 2 years! LOL! Give him a good long time to prepare! <br />
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I figure, since I have to get older anyway...I may as well embrace and enjoy it! Tonyettehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09701651294305220486noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16742052.post-22270009989489791442012-06-01T11:07:00.001-04:002012-06-01T11:07:13.777-04:00Overflowing with HOPE!!!!I don't always write from my "Christian woman" standpoint or about my beliefs...but they are the ruling factor in my life, my beliefs. Well, the ONE belief is the ruling single factor in my life. The Lord Jesus Christ is God...He's MY God! That is my single belief! And IT is the ruling factor of my life! One of the many zillion reasons that I love Him...He gives HOPE like no one and nothing else can! It's amazing! I have conversations with my brothers and sisters in Christ and I see how we can just BELIEVE for these great things...and even for the mundane. We can believe that "everything will be ok" without any kind of real or tangible assurance. We can also believe that God will give us things that require money, lots of money, even if we have NO money! It's something that the "world" can't and doesn't understand. Sometimes I take that, the HOPE that comes from knowing and trusting Christ, for granted! Romans 15:13 (NIV) says "May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." He is the God of HOPE...and I trust in Him! I do have joy and peace! By the power of the Holy Spirit, I overflow with HOPE!Tonyettehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09701651294305220486noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16742052.post-92178746381459989132012-05-17T18:49:00.000-04:002012-06-14T13:15:04.198-04:00All these changesI started a post a while back, with the title above. but I never finished it. I deleted it and started writing this. But...as the title indicates, I have gone through some major changes in the last few months! For starters, I GOT MARRIED! I could write all these different things about that, but the short version is this: I. Love. IT! I enjoy knowing that he's there when I wake up randomly in the middle of the night. I love it that, even though he's usually pretty tired, he indulges my desire to have full & deep conversations at 3am. Being married has given me a sense of security that I didn't think I would ever need or even like as "woman who's doing it for herself." I don't love the moments when my husband has to MAKE me stop being so busy or when he's right about something and I'm wrong and have to admit it. But, even in those moments, I LOVE being married! It's causing me to learn a lot about myself. The main thing, though, is that I LOVE it. I love being married...and I love being married to my husband, specifically! <br /><br />I also got a promotion at work! It was really the answer to prayers! I had been going through some horribly rough times for the past couple of, well, years actually! Finally, God worked some things out where I didn't even have to leave my current area. Someone else was moved away and I got to move into the position I had wanted for a while anyway! Now, don't read that and think, "She prayed that other person away" because I would NEVER do that! I simply asked that God would give me peace! And He did! He did it in His own way. I've got all these changes! I'm so grateful!Tonyettehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09701651294305220486noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16742052.post-9425841799982265252011-11-21T08:49:00.001-05:002011-11-21T09:09:06.553-05:00Mr. NOT right!This morning, I was randomly thinking about this guy I used to have a crush on. I guess that's the best way to put it. We "talked", I guess you <i>could </i>call it, if you HAD to call it something, for a lil while. This morning, specifically, I was thinking about how he told me, pretty much, "you are called by GOD and I ain't the one for that!" I used to say "if I were to build a guy, he would look like _ _ _ _ _". And while that statement IS true, I'm thankful that God's thoughts are higher! I'm grateful that "There are many devices in a man's heart; nevertheless the counsel of the LORD, that shall stand." Proverbs 19:21 delivers this GREAT news! Because, if I had it my way, and somehow we did magically get married (I LAUGHED as I typed that), assuming he stopped playing games long enough to actually get serious with me (he did eventually get married...so I assume he got serious about someone, huh?!) I'd be worried about whether or not my husband was too drunk to drive home...or to find his way back to my bed! (That second part is just a guess! I haven't talked to this guy in years and I don't plan to find out. But...I'm just guessing at certain things!) I felt a bit "dissed" by some of his actions, initially, but I'm VERY grateful! Like...grateful BEYOND words! God knows ALL things! So, to Mr. _ _ _ _ _ _ _, thank you for straight up acknowledging that you were NOT the "one" for me! I SO appreciate it! And God, thank You for being God and for knowing all things! Proverbs 16:1 (in the New Living Translation) says "We can make our own plans, but the LORD gives the right answer." YES, Lord!Tonyettehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09701651294305220486noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16742052.post-11646681170709298422011-11-18T14:06:00.001-05:002011-11-18T14:13:14.590-05:00Mission Get Healthy!So, I haven't done a post dedicated to getting healthier (and also losing weight) in a LONG time! But it doesn't mean I've aborted this mission! In fact, just today I applauded myself for making a wise food decision! I felt like I was craving an "all bad foods" lunch! The cafeteria in my building at work pretty much offers the same menu each week! I knew today would offer the option to get a reuben. I had envisioned a reuben and chips (or fries!), along with an orange soda. Well, one, I don't need the soda because it breaks me out! (My acne is still in "active" mode, even at the age of 32! Boo to that one! Boo, I say!) But, I also recognize that I don't need the added calories! So...instead of an "all bad" lunch, I think I made some wiser choices! I got the salmon (on which they always do a great job!), a vegetable medley (a bit different today: broccoli, carrots and chickpeas!! Yum) and some sweet potato cornbread. I chose water as a my drink (with some Crystsal Light to add flavor to the water!) I am proud of myself for my choice! Not only was the food delicious, but I also feel full without feeling the accompanying misery or shame! So...yay me for a healthier choice!
Last night I went to Chick-Fil-A and only got the "Charbroiled and fruit" salad. I really wanted a #2, value-sized! But I refrained!
I'm making wiser choices and I'm proud! Whoot to me!
Here's to getting healthier (and a little skinnier!)Tonyettehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09701651294305220486noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16742052.post-62203908210252622592011-09-30T17:11:00.002-04:002011-09-30T17:11:12.873-04:00True LoveThe mere fact that looking at baking supplies on Michaels' website is bringing me this much excitement should tell me that I REALLY need to just give my current job my two weeks notice and get started on this baking in like, well, two weeks! LOL! This is really exciting for me, as I prepare for the birthday parties of two of my closest friends! (They have the same birthday but are celebrating on two different days! Thankfully, because otherwise, I'd be run ragged! But for them, I'd do it!) I'm getting all kinds of decorating ideas (for one, I'm providing cupcakes and for the other, some of the food and the desserts) and I'm telling myself "please, please, please don't spend a million dollars when you get to Michael's! PLEASE don't!" We'll see what happens! Tonyettehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09701651294305220486noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16742052.post-470690769343092822011-08-12T13:25:00.002-04:002011-08-12T13:31:18.768-04:00Mission HealthyI haven't given up on my quest to get healthier and lose weight--I type this WHILE chewing fries from McDonald's! :0( --but I have stopped posting about it! The interesting thing is that NOW I feel like I'm losing weight! So, that's good news! I am supposed to be cleaning out my "junk room" this weekend! I "remembered" that I have my elliptical! I'm trying to decide if I want to sell it or ACTUALLY start using it again! Decisions, decisions! Oh, and that reminds me, even though there is only about a month left of summer, I really want to find a pool to join! That'll be good exercise and I'll have a lot of fun! Tonyettehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09701651294305220486noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16742052.post-51404544641825598742011-08-04T16:52:00.005-04:002011-08-11T13:36:13.155-04:00Happy 6 months to me and my BCYes, it's a long title, but that's the subject of this post! I did my BC ("Big chop" for who may not know) six months ago! I no longer have any chemicals to "relax" or straighten my hair! I stopped getting perms about a year ago, I think?! But I got all the permed hair cut out in February. So, for a while there, I had about 4" of hair! It's been an interested six months to say the least, chock full of unsolicited opinions, offensive comments and rude looks, but I'm totally happy with my decision! (I did have a lapse of "I love it" for a minute!) My hair has grown in leaps and bounds and I'm already comfortable enough to have worn my bush--tamed by a headband! No, I didn't go full Angela Davis on 'em--to an interview! I'm proud that I'm doing my best, still, to accessorize and not look like a boy! I think I'm in a groove, now! My friend <a href="http://energesediting.blogspot.com/">Ja'NeƩ </a>has become my twist/braid-ologist! She's the bomb! Now, all I need to do is obtain more flowers, headbands, accessories, etc!
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<br />(I started this post a week ago! It's time that I actually, you know, post it!) Tonyettehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09701651294305220486noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16742052.post-38989737171009545662011-07-21T17:02:00.001-04:002011-07-21T17:03:39.910-04:00A Part of LifeI was taking a look at this other blog of which I was a contributor. I realized I wrote a poem (back when my paternal grandmother was diagnosed with Lou Gehrig's disease. But it was inspired by both her and my maternal grandmother.) It's pretty good and I think I'd like to write again!<br />Here it is:<br /><strong>A Part of Life </strong><br />People say that "death is a part of life,"<br />Like it's supposed to make you feel better,<br />As if it heals the hurt and dries the tears!<br />People say that "death is a part of life,"<br />Like it's supposed to be easier to let go,<br />As if somehow you'll sleep better at night!<br /><br />Strangely, it usually does.<br /><br />Knowing that "death is a part of life"<br />Makes me feel a little better.<br />It does, at least, ease the hurt and slow the tears.<br />Knowing that "death is a part of life"<br />Makes me more able to let go<br />And I do sleep a little better most nights.<br /><br />So, "death is a part of life"!<br />BUT, what then, is the dying?<br />Is that also a part of life?<br />What can be said then?<br /><br />To see the strong, the vibrant, the independent<br />Become the weak, the dull, the dependent.<br />To see a person full of life, love, kindness and humor<br />Become just about lifeless, mean, moody and witless.<br />This is the dying!<br />This is the part that people forget to speak about!<br />This is the process that I'm still trying to deal with.<br /><br />"Death is a part of life" but what is the dying?Tonyettehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09701651294305220486noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16742052.post-84854429521124123662011-07-19T14:31:00.004-04:002011-07-20T15:14:16.082-04:00Sometimes I'm scared......of EVERYTHING! Well, that's not true...I'm scared of being great! That seems so BIG to say...but it's true! I don't worry about being left out or being insignificant. I am in a constant quandary about doing something that will cause people to have to, or want to, look at me! So...I don't follow through with moneymaking or award-winning ideas. I hold back intelligent solutions to impossible problems. I shut my mouth when I should scream out loud. I know that I could be a great writer, actress, dancer and singer. I could work well as a (plus-size) model. Heck, I could lose weight and work as a regular model. I could solve mathematical problems and teach the world's children how to read and add. But...I get nervous about it! What's up with that?! This isn't my first time writing about this (I don't think) and I sometimes think "here I GO!" Then, I get scared again! What the heck?!<br />Oh well, I'll keep praying and keep trusting that, through GOD, I CAN do everything He created me to do and use all the gifts He gave me!<br />Stay tuned...Tonyettehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09701651294305220486noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16742052.post-86206669869902833942011-07-13T17:44:00.002-04:002011-07-13T17:57:43.569-04:00Happy birthday to me...10 days laterI started a post about my birthday...but I never finished it! Hmm...anyway, I'm 32 years old now! :0) Yay me! Time has sped by but I'm so blessed to have seen these years and I can't wait to see what God has for me as I'm now in my 33rd year of life! <br />I'd like to see, by this time next year, that I have moved along successfully in my baking (and tutoring) business(es), have a job that I LOVE, car and nice amount in my savings! These are all attainable goals and I'm actively working on all of them! Whoot!Tonyettehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09701651294305220486noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16742052.post-18657109483605559752011-07-13T17:31:00.003-04:002011-07-13T17:43:59.773-04:00Mission Get Healthy...still going!So...I've been busy this summer it seems! YAY me! :0) I didn't post this past Friday because I was at the family reunion of my paternal grandmother. I must say that I knew going into the weekend that my eating would probably be "all kinds of whatever!" I mean, it was "cookout food in the South" so I knew I was pretty much doomed! BUT I didn't do too badly! My family offered pork and turkey "barbecue" and I chose the turkey option. (It was REALLY good, too!)I only ate baked chicken. I didn't eat any fried...but I did have a piece of fried fish. I made sure to get vegetables on my plate. Also, I really wanted some Cold stone ice cream, so I didn't have any of the desserts from the cookout! (It was TOUGH not to make a "desserts plate" like I used to do, but I was able to persevere! LOL!) When I got to Cold Stone, I REALLY wanted a "love it" size (or "medium" for those who have never been to Cold Stone Creamery) but I didn't. I got a "like it"--"small" and was proud of myself for the restraint. This past week wasn't as great as it should have been, but it wasn't as terrible as it could have been, either! <br />Oh well, I'm two days away from Friday...here's to hoping I have SOMETHING good to report this week! :0)Tonyettehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09701651294305220486noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16742052.post-23484751798017016742011-07-01T10:24:00.001-04:002011-07-01T10:31:45.567-04:00Mission Get HEALTHY! (Week 5)I skipped last week (was at a conference with my church) but I'm back this week with some good news! I have a "good decision of the day" two days in a row! The first one is that I finally went to a <a href="http://www.zumba.com/en-US/about/">Zumba </a>class last night! I have some friends who attend and I kept saying that I needed to go. Well, one friend lovingly "called me out" by telling me that she'd been hearing me say "girl, I need to go" for a month or more. So...I finally went! I'm glad that I did, even though a sister was TIRED after a while! But I already pre-paid for my next class! Also, this morning's "good decision of the day" was that I REALLY wanted breakfast from Chick-fil-a or McDonald's, but I chose to eat the yogurt with fruit and granola that I brought instead. Yay, me! I'm getting it together, piece by piece!!Tonyettehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09701651294305220486noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16742052.post-84226220253653174492011-06-18T00:25:00.004-04:002011-06-18T00:32:39.145-04:00Mission Get Healthy (Week 3)Today, I don't have much to say. I STILL haven't gotten on the elliptical, sadly! Hopefully I'll get the gumption to do so this upcoming week! I haven't had any meat or poultry since Sunday--but that's been more force than choice. More on that another time. I did make dishes that included a lot of fresh vegetables and I've had plenty of fruit as well. I still have some asparagus that needs my attention. I don't really have a "good decision of the day" for today, but I do have something exciting to report! I wore a shirt today, to work, that I haven't worn since last summer. It fits looser than it did last summer! Whoo hoo!Tonyettehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09701651294305220486noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16742052.post-42104614884392681512011-06-13T13:49:00.002-04:002011-06-13T13:54:11.157-04:00Mission Get HEALTHY! (Week 2)I missed my post on Friday, doing lots of running around, so I'll do it today!! I went to the grocery store on Friday and was very proud of myself! So, my "good decision of the day" was to buy a lot of fresh vegetables and fruits! I bought (hardly) any junk food and I think I can make it on a "less meat, more veggies" diet. My body is reacting very negatively to most meat these days anyway...and I don't even eat much, mostly poultry and fish. And eating out (fast food anyway) seems to be a thing of the past! Oh well, I look forward to all the different things I'll now try because of my mission to get healthy! Next up, I hope that the next post will be me saying "I finally got back on my elliptical"! Yes, I own one! No, I haven't been on it in years! :0( I'm ashamed! But I'll be back on soon! And I think I want to join somewhere so I can swim!Tonyettehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09701651294305220486noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16742052.post-28926393642310262332011-06-03T12:03:00.003-04:002011-06-03T13:23:53.839-04:00Mission Get HEALTHY!So...I've decided, one and for all that it's REALLY time to get healthy! I do need to lose weight and I want to overall just be healthy! So, inspired by one of my nfew favorite bloggers (and southern friend, at least in my mind, <a href="http://www.fashionmommaintraining.com/">Kimberly </a> each week, I'm going to post something related to this new mission of mine! At first I was gonna call it "Project Get Healthy" but I need to make it my MISSION from here on out! Not only do I need to do this because I'm back up, on the wrong side of 250, I'm a worship-dancer and so it would make sense that I'm in shape! Plus, I would like to, if time allows, get back into modeling. My agent told me a while back that my goal was a "comfortable 14"...clearly I only heard the "comfortable" part! :0) <br /><br />I think that this weekend, I'm going to see how many ways I can creatively cook vegetables! My mom and I have been talking about getting healthier and she was all excited about veggie lasagna! I also discovered that Safeway sells my favorite new vegetable, Brussel spouts, fresh! Whoo hoo! So hopefully I'll be making some wise food decisions! My body has kindly let me know, over the past few weeks, that the kind of eating that I did in college is no longer acceptable! So...I'm going to be changing the way I eat. Each week in my post, I'll plan to share a "good decision of the day". <br /><br />Today's "good decision of the day": I chose to eat salmon, rice & squash for lunch instead of corned beef & fries or chip like I wanted! <br /><br />Here's to getting healthy!Tonyettehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09701651294305220486noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16742052.post-14825417178252103672011-03-30T16:20:00.002-04:002011-03-30T16:38:47.032-04:00I am not my hair!So...I finally did it! I've been thinking about cutting my hair and "going natural"--removing all the chemicals from my hair--for years! I said I'd do it at 30! Well, at half past 31, I finally did it! And you know what I've discovered?! It wasn't that deep! I mean, yes, I do have to figure out exactly what products work best for my hair texture and the look(s) I'll want to achieve--sidenote, EVERYONE has a suggestion! Wow! I didn't realize I'd get so many unsolicited comments about hair products! Whoo! I do need to figure out how much into the natural, um, "movement" for lack of a better term, I'm willing to go--I'm not getting locks! I do need to figure out how to maintain my hair--it's SO much drier than I ever realized. BUT it's not a spiritual journey. My life is a spiritual journey! I'm ever on a quest to be closer to God and to be just like Jesus. My haircut is not a reflection thereof! I promise! I do admit to feeling freer, but that's just, like freer to walk outside in the rain with no umbrella or get my hair wet in the shower! I do feel that, with a haircut akin to Arnold Drummond's, I must do whatever I can to ensure that people don't mistake me for a little boy! So my makeup, clothing and accessories have all been stepped up! And I'm excited to see how that continues! But, that's it! I am VERY excited about the haircut and I'm loving seeing my actual texture all over my head. But...that's it! Even in this, I am not my hair!Tonyettehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09701651294305220486noreply@blogger.com0